Why Some Men Still Don’t Talk About Their Feelings

Video – Vlog #43

Why don’t men show their emotions?

Why don’t men talk about their feelings?

How do you get a man to talk about his feelings?

Script – VLog #43

David Logan: Hi and welcome everybody to the Techno Dinosaur Meets the IT Geek, week 43.

David Logan: My name’s David Logan, the IT Geek, based here in Annan, south west of Scotland. I am the IT Geek who takes the jargon out of technology for you the home worker and the home office worker.

David Logan: Today we are with my usual partner in crime, Willie Nicol. So, Willie, how are you and where are you today?

Willie Nicol: Thank you David, I’m very well. I’m based in Troon, South Ayrshire, Scotland. I am the Techno Dinosaur, also a personal development life coach. So, the beauty of being here is I get to pick your brains David.

David Logan: Brilliant. Where you pick my brains, I want to pick your brain. My question’s gone out my brain here, what I was going to ask you. I’ll come back to that later, towards the end. This week’s question, I want to ask you …. Why do we, as a male species, why as men, why don’t we open up and show our feelings Willie?

Willie Nicol: Very good question David, thanks. There are several reasons for this, and we could be here for a lot, lot longer than we normally are.

David Logan: I’ve got all night.

Willie Nicol: Men traditionally have been seen as the strong ones. We are the guys, the hunter gatherers from way back in stone age times who went back and brought the food home. And showing our emotions and showing our feelings was seen as being weak and that went against the male stereotype of being strong, silent, bringing the bacon home, so to speak. And that has been caused by a number of factors. Our up bringing, for example, we, as young men, are surrounded by other young men, our peers. And you didn’t want to show any weakness or emotion in front of your buddies, did you?

Willie Nicol: You may have been influenced by your father or other male elders who showed you that portraying emotions was not a good thing, not a “manly” thing. And we’ve all heard the various phrases to describe this. “Shoulders back”. “Chest out”. “Man up”. “Big boys don’t cry”. And consciously or unconsciously, we absorbed it and we decided that this was the way to progress, this was the way we would go through life not showing our emotions. Because we’re apprehensive we would be identified as being weak if we did so.

David Logan: Very good. So, at what stage do you think we break away from our elders and start retraining our own brains?

Willie Nicol: Well, I think it would depend on the individual. Now, if we’re talking just about males, right. Some young men break away from their elders at the age of fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, whatever. Some take a lot longer. I think it depends on your upbringing and your environment. The ability to think for ourselves as it were.

Willie Nicol: I think, well you know, maybe that strong silent type isn’t exactly what I want to be or I want to portray and we then move away from our up bringing or our conditioning, as some people call it, to form our own opinions.

Willie Nicol: But there’s still this very powerful background story about not showing emotions, about bottling your feelings up because that’s what we’ve learned. And to “unlearn” that is quite a task, but might I suggest that it’s a good thing to consider. “Unlearning” that strong silent type, because suppression of our emotions can very often be detrimental to our mental health and sometimes to our physical health.

Willie Nicol: So, there is actually scientific evidence to show that crying is therapeutic because there are actually chemicals in your teardrops that help you unburden yourself with these pent-up emotions.

Willie Nicol: We’ve also heard stories about a good rant, losing the rag, blowing your top, can be therapeutic because you’re letting all your pent-up anger and stress and frustration out. Suppressing our emotions is like putting them in a little bottle and storing that little bottle inside ourselves. So, the emotion is still there, and it can become a bit toxic.

David Logan: So, is that almost like a pressure valve in the body?

Willie Nicol: Well, I was going to say, yes, it builds up, it festers. And what if the bottle leaks and that “poison” gets into our system. Any poison within our systems not going to be good. And I’m using this like a metaphorical sense, an allegorical sense, right.

Willie Nicol: Suppressing emotions, and we’ve talked about stress and anxiety as well, about the chemicals within this, if we have the wrong type of chemicals within us that can be detrimental to mental and physical health.

Willie Nicol: So, I’m not suggesting you run down the street screaming and bawling. I’m only suggesting that you don’t bottle up your emotions, that you let your emotions out because it’s not a sign of weakness, it’s not a sign you’re not strong.

Willie Nicol: It’s a sign that you’re sufficiently self-aware to know that bottling up your emotions is not always a great thing. So, that self-awareness is actually a sign of strength, a sign of, “I’ve identified this is not a good way to go about things, bottling up my emotions, so, why not let them out”.

Willie Nicol: You can do it privately, you can do it by talking to someone like me, or whatever. But the bottom line David is we’re conditioned through upbringing, through “osmosis”, through our peer pressure, not to show emotions and that can be detrimental to us.

David Logan: Great, fantastic. I think that’s us towards the end of the time now for this week. Unless you’ve got anything else you’d want to add briefly? Maybe summarise what you’ve just said there?

Willie Nicol: Well, I think I did just summarise it there. One thing I’d leave the viewers with is – we’re emotional beings, humans, right. We’re happy, sad, angry, frustrated, whatever it is, and any negative emotion we bottle up isn’t a good thing. Let them out. It’s not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of self-awareness and strength and you’ll feel a lot better for it. That’s all I would say. 

David Logan: Fantastic. Thank you, Willie. So, to the viewer, specifically to you, men, boys, or the male species. If you’re frightened, if you’re unsure, speak to Willie.

David Logan: Add a comment below here. If you want to keep it confidential, send us a private message. If you connect it to me, send me a private message I’ll forward it to Willie or vice versa. Sorry, to Willie, send it direct to Willie.

David Logan: Anything technical, give me a shout, the IT Geek. That’s my job to take the jargon out of technology, keep it simple for you.

David Logan: Please, to the viewer, both females and males, we need subscribers for YouTube, our YouTube channel. Jump on it please, subscribe. Excellent. Willie, last words?

Willie Nicol: As I say repeatedly, stay safe, keep well but also try and have some fun along the way. Not always easy but one thing I would say, laughter’s the best medicine. It’s an emotion where it’s joyful. So, it’s goodbye from me, Willie Nicol, the Techno Dinosaur.

David Logan: Keep smiling, keep safe, keep healthy everybody. Have a good week. Thank you.

41 thoughts on “Why Some Men Still Don’t Talk About Their Feelings

  • 23 July 2023 at 15:01

    This site truly has all the information I needed concerning this subject
    and didn’t know who to ask.

  • 24 July 2023 at 08:50

    Wow, this paragraph is pleasant, my sister is analyzing these
    things, therefore I am going to let know her.

  • 27 July 2023 at 06:22

    Excellent goods from you, man. I’ve be mindful your stuff prior to and you’re simply
    too magnificent. I actually like what you have obtained here,
    really like what you are saying and the best way during which you are saying it.
    You’re making it enjoyable and you still take care of to stay it sensible.
    I can not wait to read much more from you. This is actually a great web site.

  • 29 July 2023 at 19:48

    Doess your blog have a contact page? I’m having a tough tike
    locaging it but, I’d like to send yoou ann email. I’ve goot some
    creatiive deas forr yolur blog you miught be interestdd inn hearing.
    Either way, gret site and I look forwatd to seeing it expand over time.

  • 28 September 2023 at 10:32

    Thanks for your marvelous posting! I genuinely enjoyed reading it,
    you are a great author. I will be sure to bookmark
    your blog and will eventually come back very soon. I
    want to encourage you to definitely continue your great posts, have a nice weekend!

  • 22 November 2023 at 15:12

    Быстро возводимые здания: финансовая польза в каждом строительном блоке!
    В современном мире, где время имеет значение, экспресс-конструкции стали реальным спасением для компаний. Эти современные конструкции обладают устойчивость, финансовую эффективность и быстрый монтаж, что дает им возможность идеальным выбором для разных коммерческих начинаний.
    [url=https://bystrovozvodimye-zdanija-moskva.ru/]Быстровозводимые здания[/url]
    1. Высокая скорость возвода: Моменты – наиважнейший аспект в бизнесе, и здания с высокой скоростью строительства обеспечивают существенное уменьшение сроков стройки. Это чрезвычайно полезно в постановках, когда необходимо оперативно начать предпринимательскую деятельность и начать получать доход.
    2. Экономия: За счет усовершенствования производственных процессов элементов и сборки на месте, затраты на экспресс-конструкции часто приходит вниз, по сравнению с обычными строительными задачами. Это позволяет сэкономить средства и достичь более высокой инвестиционной доходности.
    Подробнее на [url=https://bystrovozvodimye-zdanija-moskva.ru/]https://scholding.ru[/url]
    В заключение, объекты быстрого возвода – это лучшее решение для бизнес-мероприятий. Они сочетают в себе молниеносную установку, финансовую выгоду и надежность, что обуславливает их первоклассным вариантом для предпринимателей, стремящихся оперативно начать предпринимательскую деятельность и обеспечивать доход. Не упустите возможность сократить издержки и сэкономить время, прекрасно себя показавшие быстровозводимые сооружения для вашего следующего проекта!

  • 7 December 2023 at 14:41

    Hi there, You’ve done a great job. I will definitely digg it
    and personally suggest to my friends. I’m confident they will be benefited from this web site.

    my blog post; 토토커뮤니티

  • 10 December 2023 at 02:36

    Эффективное воздухонепроницаемость обшивки — удобство и бюджетность в приватном доме!
    Согласитесь, ваш дом заслуживает превосходного! Утепление фасадов – не голос решение для сбережения на тепле, это вклад в комфорт и долголетие вашего дома.
    ✨ Почему изоляция с специалистами?
    Мастерство в своем деле: Наши специалисты – опытные мастера. Наш коллектив заботимся о каждой конкретной, чтобы обеспечить вашему домовладению идеальное теплосбережение.
    Сумма теплоизоляции: Наша компания ценим ваш финансовые ресурсы. [url=https://stroystandart-kirov.ru/]Утепление фасадов цена за м2[/url] – начиная от 1350 руб./кв.м. Это инвестиция в ваше приятное будущее!
    Энергосбережение: Забудьте о теплопотерях! Наши материалы не только сохраняют тепловое комфорта, но и дарят вашему жилищу новый уровень теплосбережения энергоэффективности.
    Превратите свой домашнюю обстановку тепловым и стильным!
    Подробнее на [url=https://stroystandart-kirov.ru/]https://n-dom.ru/
    Не передавайте на произвол судьбы свой домовладение на волю случайности. Доверьтесь профессионалам и создайте уют вместе с нашей командой!

  • 5 January 2024 at 00:14

    프라그마틱 게임은 iGaming 분야에서 주목받는 주요 제공 업체로, 혁신적이고 표준화된 콘텐츠를 선보입니다.

    프라그마틱 슬롯에 대한 내용이 정말 도움이 되었어요! 더불어, 제 사이트에서도 프라그마틱과 관련된 정보를 찾아보세요. 함께 서로 이야기하며 더 많은 지식을 쌓아가요!


  • 11 January 2024 at 09:58

    Howdy this is somewhat of off topic but I was wondering if blogs
    use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with
    HTML. I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding
    experience so I wanted to get advice from someone with experience.
    Any help would be enormously appreciated!

  • 12 January 2024 at 15:43

    Забота о жилье – это забота о благополучии. Утепление наружных стен – это не только модный облик, но и обеспечение сохранения тепла в вашем уютном уголке. Специалисты, наши мастера, предлагаем вам сделать ваш дом в прекрасное место обитания.
    Выполненные нами проекты – это не просто утепление, это художественная работа с каждым элементом. Мы осуществляем совершенному сочетанию между внешним видом и практической ценностью, чтобы ваш дом превратился не только теплым, но и привлекательным.
    И самое важное – доступные тарифы! Мы уверены, что профессиональные услуги не должны быть неприемлемо дорогими. [url=https://ppu-prof.ru/]Стоимость утепления фасада дома[/url] начинается всего начиная с 1250 рублей за квадрат.
    Современные технологии и качественные материалы позволяют нам создавать термомодернизацию, которая гарантирует долгий срок службы и надежность. Оставьте в прошлом холодные стены и лишние затраты на отопление – наше утепление станет вашим надежным защитником от холода.
    Подробнее на [url=https://ppu-prof.ru/]интернет-ресурсе[/url]
    Не откладывайте на потом заботу о приятности в вашем доме. Обращайтесь к опытным мастерам, и ваш дом преобразится настоящим художественным произведением, которое подарит вам не только тепло. Вместе мы создадим дом, в котором вам будет по-настоящему удобно!

  • 15 January 2024 at 04:59

    magnificent post, very informative. I ponder why the other specialists
    of this sector don’t realize this. You must proceed
    your writing. I’m confident, you’ve a great readers’
    base already!

  • 4 February 2024 at 13:53

    Have you ever thought about writing an e-book or guest authoring on other websites?
    I have a blog based on the same subjects you discuss and would really like to have
    you share some stories/information. I know my visitors would value your work.

    If you are even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e-mail.

  • 6 February 2024 at 12:17

    🌌 Wow, this blog is like a rocket blasting off into the universe of excitement! 🎢 The thrilling content here is a captivating for the imagination, sparking awe at every turn. 💫 Whether it’s lifestyle, this blog is a source of exhilarating insights! #InfinitePossibilities Dive into this cosmic journey of knowledge and let your thoughts roam! ✨ Don’t just enjoy, experience the thrill! #FuelForThought 🚀 will thank you for this thrilling joyride through the worlds of endless wonder! 🚀

  • 11 February 2024 at 17:48

    Hi there, its good article regarding media print, we all be aware of media is a impressive source of data.

  • 14 February 2024 at 19:23

    Уважаемые Знакомые!
    Приводим вам новейшее слово в мире оформления внутреннего пространства – шторы плиссе. Если вы желаете к идеальности в любой нюансе вашего домашнего, то эти сукна превратятся выдающимся подходом для вас.
    Что делает шторы плиссе настолько живыми оригинальными? Они совмещают в себе грацию, действенность и полезность. Благодаря особенной литере, последним тканям, шторы плиссе идеально соответствуют для какова угодно пространства, будь то хата, ложа, плитки или трудовое пространство.
    Закажите [url=https://tulpan-pmr.ru]плиссированные жалюзи на окна[/url] – сформируйте уют и красивость в вашем доме!
    Чем прельщают шторы плиссе для вас? Во-первых, их поразительный стиль, который прибавляет привлекательность и вкус вашему жилищу. Вы можете отыскивать из различных текстур, оттенков и стилей, чтобы подчеркнуть особенность вашего дома.
    Кроме того, шторы плиссе предлагают широкий ассортимент функциональных возможностей. Они могут регулировать уровень освещения в месте, покрывать от солнечного света, предоставлять секретность и формировать комфортную атмосферу в вашем доме.
    Наш сайт: [url=https://tulpan-pmr.ru]https://tulpan-pmr.ru[/url]
    Наша фирма поможем вам выбрать шторы плиссе, какие отлично гармонизируются с для вашего внутреннего пространства!

  • 20 February 2024 at 13:21

    I’m not that much of a online reader to be honest but your blogs really nice, keep it up!
    I’ll go ahead and bookmark your site to come back later on. Many

  • 20 February 2024 at 18:59

    제자와 손자를 받아들일 때 상대방의 배경을 먼저 묻지 말고 먼저 인물을 보라.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *